A great deal of evidence suggests that the ability to form a stable relationship begins in infancy, in a child’s earliest experiences with a caregiver who reliably meets the infant’s needs for food, care, protection, stimulation, and social contact. Those relationships are not destiny, but they appear to establish patterns of relating to others. Failed relationships happen for many reasons. We each have differing values and ways of looking at the world, and we want different things from each other. Such differences derive from our genetically influenced temperaments, our belief systems, and experiences growing up in our family of origin. “We think, ‘My father knew how to put the toilet seat down, so why can’t you?’ Or ‘My father never put the toilet seat down, so I’m not going to, either.'” Whatever the source, such patterns are deeply ingrained, difficult to dislodge. But small problems can grow into mega problems in your mind—when you add them up as evidence of a character flaw or moral defect. You’re annoyed by the fact that your wife hates sharing food from her plate. And that she hates planning in advance. And that when you try to share important news, she gets excited and cuts you off to share something of her own. When you consider them together, a picture emerges of your partner as selfish and self-absorbed, always putting her own needs first. But the truth is, if you want to stay in your marriage, something needs to change. In all likelihood, it’s you. Every annoyance in marriages is really a two-way street. Partners focus on what they’re getting, not on what they’re giving. But no matter how frustrating a partner’s behaviour, your interpretation is the greater part of it. What matters is the meaning you attach to it. And when these meanings are not ironed out properly, the end result is always DIVORCE.
Before every marriage begins, there’s a Connection either through a friend or through some other means which leads to an introduction thereafter there is an exchange of contacts leading toCommunication which climaxes to friendship for some months and then after deliberate courtship, communication again pops up the million dollars question “Will you marry me” which takes Friendship to determine. So, communication and friendship are the bedrock of marriage. In Genesis 2:22-23 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.” From here we saw communication working right there. Eve was excited that she’s not alone and that she’s part of someone and from someone. Adam could not reject the fruit from Eve because of Friendship. He doesn’t want to be alone… within him he said if you fall, I fall with you. Though it was on the negative, but it was a decision that was made out of true friendship. Our world is messed up with the stories and tragedies of Divorce because couple’s forgot the very thing that started the marriage in the first place. Even when marriages are going through tough times, when couple’s still hold on to communication and still communicate with each other, when society demands them to lie on same bed and the man faces the north and the woman face the south, the man wakes up in the morning with nothing to say to his wife and off he’s gone to work to return in the evening after having dinner out and returned to bed to continue the routine. They forgot friendship and soon realise they were never compatible. They forgot friendship what made them share their dreams, ambitions, and goals. Hate soon creeped in and Love dies. All because Friendship and Communication was neglected in the face of little issues that were not fixed but soon grew into ambiguous issues. Won’t you break the barrier of marriage today?